Mothers are either glorified or blamed, the job description is almost impossible to live up to, daughters are often angry at their mother and don’t know their mother’s history before they came into the world. It’s hard for daughters to come to a place of compassion, without realizing their mother had a whole complicated life before they came into the world.
What happens without healthy dialog? Stories and diagnosis are often created.
My daughter and family certainly have a story and have diagnosed me. And there is no dialog. I’ve tried, but it seems their story and diagnosis of me is serving them somehow.
We weren’t taught how to have hard conversations, how to listen in order to understand.
This is some of what I gleaned from listening to this conversation with Harriet Lerner and Sheleana Aiyana
Navigating mother/daughter relationships with Harriet Lerner
I remain open to miracles, healthy dialog with a willingness to own up to my part and with compassionate listening from all parties involved.
Thanks Wendy for sharing this youtube.
And thanks as always to all who read this.
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Love you Frances. I hope we can visit when you come back to Eugene. We can sit six feet apart in a lovely park and share our stories.
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